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I am being made more and more aware of just how some folks don’t seem to get it. That they cannot dictate to an author what to write or how to write. I just became aware another fav of mine was pretty much publicly drawn and quartered on a blog. And when she defended herself and what she wrote, she was pretty much called disgusting names and treated like dirt. So here is the letter I sent her and to her newsgroup. I hope that it resonates with some folks. If you see yourself as one who is doing this kind of thing, then stop it! Consider what you say, what you post. Is that how you really want to portray yourself publicly? Because that is what your doing! I know there will be those who tear this apart. Read between the lines, assigning meaning that is not there. Call me names. Generally doing what was done to one of my favorite authors. But then I think about it, and I am in good company! Because I happen to know she is a kind, witty and wonderful person, in addition to being a terrific author. I have had the pleasure of meeting her and talking to her. So if I am to be relegated to the same group, then cool! I couldn’t ask for better company.
Hi MaryJanice! I saw that they have started picking on you too! I am so sorry. I kept hoping it was limited to Laurell. But more and more I am seeing it is not. Because we do hear it from other authors too. I am not sure what it is about the internet that inspires people to be rude! Other than anonymity. But for some reason, people who wouldn’t dream of saying it to your face, feel free to post it on the web. And god help anyone who disagrees with them. It is like junior high, they have to be right or their world ends apparently.
I finally got to where I started asking to see the original posts of things Laurell or I supposedly said. Too often through cut and paste things get attributed to the wrong party. Sometimes, I think it is accidental. Some of it I know is intentional. Worse, are the folks who read between the lines and attribute things never stated. They cannot take what is said at face value, they have to spin it, like politicians to meet their own needs.
But once a rumor has started it is almost impossible to stop! And you are supposed to rise above it all and be magnanimous and gracious. I love how some folks have higher expectations for everyone else, want special rights for themselves, that they don’t extend to others. As long as you agree with them, then it is okay to say something, but if you disagree or defend yourself, then you are some kind of horrible person out to cause them harm. They never consider that their opinions (and that is all they are, opinions, not facts), might be painful for someone else. That being rude and nasty is neither clever nor cute. And just because a few folks tell you that it is, doesn’t make it so. There is always someone out there ready to tear down anything. They seem to revel in doing so. Why they are so miserable and cannot find some joy in life is I don’t know, and is just sad, in my opinion.
You?re an excellent writer! Funny, witty and craft a heck of a story! Else, I wouldn’t read you. And Laurell would not now be out on tour answering the question about who writes something similar readers might like and giving your name and Charlaine Harris as good choices. So please don’t let the trolls get you down. I applaud you for standing up for yourself. Laurell and I both have had abuse heaped on us for not agreeing with everything someone else says. Or daring to defend ourselves. People are not clones. We do not all like exactly the same thing. Liking or not liking something isn’t wrong or right. It is simply a matter of personal choice. What is to one persons taste, is not to another. And I like that! Personally, I like diversity. I want there to be choices out there. I want to explore new things, and if I don’t like something, well, then I can walk away from it. I don’t demand it change to suit me!
Could you imagine walking in to a museum and demanding that a painting be changed simply because you don’t like it? Paint out that cow and repaint it on the other side of the tree. I don’t like the expression on that statue, have it rechisled to something more pleasant. How about movies? I don’t like that actor in the movie, refilm the whole thing but using this actor and not that one. The costumes are terrible. Let me tell you how to dress them better. How about stores? I don’t like the way this is organized. Move the cereal section to the center of the store, and get rid of the house wares they are not necessary. Worse, how would you like it to be your own home? This living room furniture has to go! Get something modern, glass and chrome. Your bedroom needs to be totally rearranged, it just isn’t efficient. Most folks would throw a fit if any of these things happened!
These are books. They are written just the way the author wants. The reader is free to choose to read or not. Readers do not get to dictate what is written. Writing is not a committee exercise! But some folks don’t seem to get that. They think they can do a better job. If they could, they should be out there writing books. It is easier to criticize than do any day of the week. I have flat out asked how do you make everyone happy? And no one has answered that. If these folks are unhappy with the books, they should stop reading. Again, it gets abuse heaped on you for suggesting they stop reading. That you don’t have the right to tell them to stop. I don’t eat food I don’t like. I don’t watch movies I know I won’t like. No one makes me do it one way or the other than me! So if I didn’t like an author, I stop reading their books! Sounds simple and logical. And I am not suggesting anyone do something, I myself don’t do!
Go MaryJanice go! Keep writing them just the way you do. And don’t ever let them make you apologize for it.
So I am going to end my rant with a lesson my mother taught me years ago.
My mother was a hostess in a restaurant. The manager was no where to be found when my mother realized that one of the customers was being incredibly rude and nasty to a waitress. So my mom went over there to find out what was up. Seems the customer did not like his meal. Though he had eaten all but a few bites of it. He was ranting and raving about how horrible it was and how he felt he shouldn’t have to pay for it. It was that bad. My mother never minces words. She did point out to the man that he had eaten almost the entire thing before complaining. Yet, she would make his meal complimentary. She then suggested the next time he was hungry, he eat elsewhere. She also told him about the four restaurants within one mile of that one. He left in a huff. But the point my mother told me was, you don’t have to take abuse from someone. If he was as truly unhappy as he claimed, then he wouldn’t be back. There are just some folks in the world who are not happy unless they are bitching. The trick is, not to take the misery they are trying to spread around and make it your own.
Darla