International Women’s Day
Mar
08,
2015
I really hate this day because I’m not sure why we need a day to remind us that woman are important. We’re over half the human race. There are almost always more girls than boys born every year. We out number the men. Yet, here we are reminding people that there are women scientists. I knew that as a child. I read about Madame Curie and Jane Goodall was a personal hero of mine. There are women in every branch of science and mathematics. Why is that still a surprise to anyone?
There are women athletes, police officers, soldiers, politicians, weight lifters, firefighters, every job that men can do we do, except sperm donor, and there the men have us, but then we are the only egg donors. It takes both of us to make a new life, a new human being, of either sex.
If all the above is true, then why do we need an International Woman’s Day? Why can’t everyday be a celebration of women and men and whatever sexual determination in between, that exists or may exist in the future? I don’t know, but I do know that I’m still getting asked, “Why do you write strong female characters?”
I’ve asked the male writers I know and they’ve never been asked, “Why do you write strong male characters?” They’ve never even been asked, “Why do you write weak male characters? Or, caring male characters . . . or why do you write male characters?”
It’s 2015, and I think it’s time we all understood that women can be strong, men can be caring, and that whether you make a good stay-at-home parent is more about your personality than your gender. That whoever is more career driven should go out and pursue that career, regardless of whether they are male or female. Just be you – whoever, whatever, that is for you.
I’m tired of things that divide me from the rest of the human race. I’d like to embrace what brings us together, what makes us love each other, not what makes us hate each other. I’m tired of the male bashing and I’m tired of catcalls from passing strangers. I’m just as tired of the women who are cruel and belittle other women because of some misguided idea that somehow by cutting other women down it makes them look better, it doesn’t, as I am of the men who belittle women simply because they’re women, as if that matters. It’s not a question of gender, it’s a question of respect for yourself and for others. If you don’t respect yourself, it’s very hard to respect others. I have female friends and male friends, and anyone that tells you that the genders can’t be friends with each other because sex gets in the way is full of shit. My best friend on this planet is a man. We’ve seen each other through divorces, second marriages, career changes, you name it and some things you probably couldn’t name. We are each other’s 3 AM phone call, when the rest of the world has gone black.
I spent the day with my girlfriend Genevieve shopping for the last few things we need on the remodel of our home. I texted with my daughter Trinity, because she was at a convention with friends this weekend. She’s turned twenty, which still seems odd, but on International Women’s Day is seemed like talking to my daughter was appropriate. Of course, we talk and visit when there’s not a special day celebrating women too. Jonathon visited his mother today, not because it was International Women’s Day but because he loves her. Spike, Genevieve’s husband and the other man in my life, is the one cooking dinner tonight because he’s awesome that way. He’s masculine in the best sense of the word, the traditional ideal of a good man, but he certainly doesn’t see cooking as women’s work or men’s work, it’s just part of running a household. Tonight he cooked, tomorrow it may be Genevieve’s turn or Jonathon’s turn. It’s rarely my turn since I am domestically challenged. They’d rather have dinner well prepared and timely than let me take a turn. At our house, everyday is International Women’s Day and International Men’s Day. We try to celebrate each other’s skills and strengths and work around our weaknesses every day. There’s no woman’s work, or man’s work, there’s just work and we try to find the best person for the job. If it’s heavy lifting beyond what I lift in the gym, it just makes sense to use the men’s upper body strength. If it’s sewing a hole in a beloved pair of jeans, you want any of the other three of my partners, but not me. If you want me to write a book or short story, I’m all over that, but sewing is not a strength for me. Jonathon is better with a rifle than I am. Spike is better at hand-to-hand. Genevieve is the best organized of us all. She’s also the tallest and I’m the shortest, so everybody gets to, “come be tall” for me, unless they want me climbing the cabinets to reach the highest shelves.
So, happy International Women’s Day, but here at our house we don’t need a day to remind us that women are great, or that men are great, or that everyone is special regardless of gender, race, or nationality. I wish the rest of the world seemed to know what we’ve learned at home: that we are stronger and happier together than we are apart.
On Sunday, March 8, 2015, Laurel K Hamilton <lkh@laurellkhamilton.org> wrote:
16 thoughts on “International Women’s Day”
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Thank you! So well said.
Amen! Wonderfully said! <3
I partially don’t agree. In Romania, Women’s Day is more like Mother’s Day, so we celebrate the miracle of being a mother, the long nights and hard work they put in to raise the children they were blessed to have. We don’t make a fuss about women and men, but in school we give teachers a flower and we make with children card and sing songs for mothers (granparents or fathers as well 🙂 ). I think it’s nice.
liked what you had to say here so much that i used parts of the last two paragraphs to make a piZap image with those sentences, and cited your name and it’s being based on this blog on international womens day…ok?
The reason you don’t seem to understand the need for the day is it isn’t about or for you. It’s about women who are systematically abused, mutilated, murdered, discriminated against, repressed and enslaved simply because they are women. It’s to bring awareness to those atrocities and it’s not about navel-gazing.
I think Hamilton said it though. All of those things that you said happen to women, also happen to men. Just sayin’.
Yes, but they don’t happen to men just because they are men. The point of having a day/week/month dedicated to something specific is to bring awareness to certain issues as well as to highlight the contributions of a certain group of people. We need Women’s History Month and International Women’s Day just as we need Black History Month, or any other awareness days. It’s all fine and dandy to say everyone is equal, but the fact is, the accomplishments of men, particularly white men, are celebrated on a daily basis whereas we don’t learn or talk about other people as often. Like everyone learns who invented the printing press and the cotton gin in history class, but how many people know that a Japanese woman wrote the world’s first novel?
You are right when you say that we learn about the accomplishments of a select few people.
But, you are wrong if you think the atrocities that are done to women are not done to men as well. The biggest difference is that most men will not admit to themselves or others that the action occurred.
It is unfortunate, but there still too many people worldwide that choose to blame the victim rather than the abuser. Because of this, there are a large amount of crimes that go unreported every day.
Laurell once again you say so eloquently exactly what the Whole world needs to hear & learn to do!! I wish the people in charge of our country would do things to strength us as a whole & bring us together! Because you are Soo right we are much stronger together than torn apart & separated!! Thank You, Blessed Be & God Bless!!
Beautifully said. Thank you for this!
We have a Mothers , a Fathers , a Grandparents, even a Family Day. We have a Bosses, a Workers, a Labour day. We have a day for cats and one for dogs. There is even a day for roses. We should have a day for women too. Maybe one for men and another for children.
I agree and disagree at the same time. I disagree for the reasons stated above, or at least my line coincides with theirs in that I know that not all women have the self respect or awareness level that we do because they are/were abused, mistreated, and, in alongside of those instances, brain-washed, usually into believing they are worthless. I’m not saying that there being an International Women’s day will miraculously save these individuals, but it does perhaps remind people in general that women matter and protecting women, as well as children, ought to be our first response, rather than our last.
Which on some bleak days sure as hell seems to be the case. It’s why when I buy my books on Amazon, I use Amazon Smile and donate the proceeds to The National Association to Protect Children, also known as Protect.org. They’re a PAC and they’ve done real things in regards to changing laws and raising awareness.
So I do what I can and understand what I can’t do and hope that anything out there that exists to raise awareness helps, because it’s sure as hell better than saying nothing can be done and sticking my head in the sand. Words are powerful tools, but behavior is the truth. So even though I agree with part of your opinion about International Women’s day, there is that part of me that knows sometimes all someone needs is a little awareness to make the right move.
Now the part I agree with is that whole ‘let’s separate the genders and continue the gender war’ theme that sometimes runs along with it. It doesn’t work that way anymore, and being something of a history buff, I know of some times in some places, way, way back when, when it didn’t work all that well either even though keeping women subverted was the social norm. Like you, my best friend is a guy; he’s been my bestie since the beginning high school and there is no ‘air quote’ sexual awareness/awkwardness ‘/end air quote’.
And I’ve had women ask me, “Does your boyfriend worry about it when you two hang out?” And I just stared, because honestly, the idea of me and Joe kissing sends me into a fit of giggles; it would be like kissing my brother. But when I put it that way to her, I could tell she didn’t believe me; which is why I hang out with Joe and not her. Also, I do a lot of guy things myself; not the gun thing, but only because gun lessons are damn expensive and where I’m at I can’t afford it. I like cars and action movies, I like doing weights and cardio at the gym and competing with the guys there to see if I can outlast them in either, and in general, I get along and understand men, better than my fellow women.
Oh, and I also can’t sew beyond replacing a button. I am, however, a good cook and I like my girly outfits/dresses, almost as much as I love my jeans and plain t-shirts. So I agree with the point that gender classification and segregation is, at this late and modern date, both pointless and childish and I wish instigators on both sides would stop poking sticks long enough to realize the rest of us have evolved away from this nonsense and we’re just waiting on them to evolve with us
Also, sorry about this essay-length narrative. It’s late so it takes more words for me to properly convey my thoughts than it would if it were late morning after a good night’s sleep 🙂
Well I feel that you are correct Laurell, I feel holidays in our couIntry are getting a little out of hand for some things that seem as obvious as a giant orange vest in hunting season. At times I feel like now they are just making holiday’s up at some point. I’ve even seen calenders with national pretzel day and what not. I personally think it would be cool if someone got to practice some of the holiday’s from their ancestral culture if they are traditional. I babble a little sorry about that, I love the pic you have and it brought me back to the first day my husband took me to the firing range it was one of the best days to store in my memories.
I would like to say this to Laurell , one thank you for all the hard work you do your creativity and imagination have helped fuel my book addiction ! I am a fan of your Anita Blake and Merry Gentry series, and well for other genre’s I mostly read horror, sci fi and fantasy , new age , blacksmithing and diy stuff. Also a thank you to everyone in your life that makes your life the best it can be day by day with the love in their hearts. And as a fellow short person 5ft 2 ( my older sister is 4ft 9 Im the tallest out of us four girls) I have also had the problem where if something is up too high for me in my house it kinda dissapears from memory and I often have to ask my 5ft11 hubby to come look for it in high places. I just keep telling myself short is only a matter of time lol.
Have a great day I look forward to more of your works may you and your loved ones have a great week. And my redbone coonhound licks the screen and nudges my face so I am off and she says Hello! lol.
I love this photo. Do you think they would put it on the inside book jacket? Don’t get me wrong, I love the other photo. Those boots are amazing. But this one is just. Anita. Thank you so much for the amazing books. Thank you for sharing your life with us.
~Cherish
I agree with everything you have said.I have always lived my life by those feelings.Also,I really like your style of writing and enjoy all of your books.Have a great day and many more .Deb
Every year at the annual Fire Department banquet for my husband’s VFD, the Chief says a special thanks to the “wonderful lady fire fighters” in his department. Then one of these “wonderful ladies” takes to the podium on behalf of all the female firefighters in the squad to express their deepest gratitude to all the officers who support them. The whole exchange never fails to get me squirming in my chair. I want to stand up and ask these women why they feel the need to give a special thanks for an equality that should be expected!