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I’ve been working on deadlines through December, or on tour, and working on a deadline, for the last ten years. This year I worked my ass off and finished the latest book, Kiss the Dead, the day before Winter Solstice. It took two weeks of working all day and into the night. 10PM was early, 1 to 2AM was more routine. I wrote ‘The End” at 4AM, and the book was done. I had Solstice, Christmas, and Yule, off for the first time in a decade. I was thrilled, my family was delighted. Jon, who had stayed in his office most of the nights I stayed up, in case I needed something, got to sleep in with me. I was beyond beat, and sleeping was a wonderful thing. It happened to coincide with Trinity, our daughter, being off school, so for the first time in years I was going to be able to take time off when she was off; yay!

The next day when I woke I was energized. I cleaned off two of my desks and begin to organize my office. There’s always debris from a book, and the office is trashed like a crime scene, if you substitute paper, and sticky notes, for blood and bodies. I felt great!

What I didn’t realize is that I’d spent the last decade training my family to be happy hermits. Trinity is playing on her new DS; Jon played WOW, World of Warcraft in his office; Chica, my sister of choice, went to see her birth family. I tried to get them all interested in going out and seeing a movie, but they’d had enough of people and out, they wanted hermit time and in. I’d asked Chica before she left, and she wanted to come home and just relax, so no one wanted to go out of the house to do anything. So, I was in a house of happy hermits, and I wanted to DO-SOMETHING!

I went to my office with the dogs, Sasquatch and Keiko with me. The dogs had gotten into the routine of being in the office constantly, so they loved it. Keiko is a rescue from a puppy mill, and this is her first Christmas in a house, so she thinks the world is all about being in my office with me into the wee hours. I meditated, and that helped. I texted some friends, and it helped some. I didn’t want to call, because I wanted to give people time with their families, but honestly talking was not what I wanted. I was beyond restless. I read in one of the many books that had been waiting for me to have the time to read, rather than just write. I drank tea, read, cuddled in the big leather chair in my office with the dogs; it was good. But I was still so restless I couldn’t stand it. If my gym had been open I’d have gone, but barring that I got on the treadmill for an hour. I have missed a lot of gym time due to the book deadline eating the world. The treadmill was good, very good, and took the edge off, then it was time to join Chica, Jon, and Trinity, for dinner, and conversation, oh, and presents. Trinity had been with her father over Christmas Eve and part of today, and we’d waited presents for her. Honestly, I had the major present that I’d wanted, the book done, and time off with my family while we were all off from school and work. I just hadn’t understood that going from a schedule like that to down time would be such an adjustment. It’s always an adjustment, but never this bad, and I hadn’t realized that everyone else would be wanting to be quiet and alone-ish, though I should have figured that. It was logical for them to want to de-stress from being out with so many people all the time. I’ve been in my office, alone for weeks, so out was what I needed. It was interesting and perfectly logical, but I so didn’t see it coming. Oh, no, Jon, hadn’t been out with too many people, he’s just naturally more solitary than I am by nature.

So tomorrow, I will make plans to do something, go somewhere, because things will be open. People can come with, or I can go by myself, but either way, I’ll be better prepared for this sense of restlessness that always comes in some form, just never quite this bad. I blame the gym, I think I’ve gotten used to moving my body when I’m restless. Sitting and reading alone, no longer refreshes me. Or maybe sitting and reading is just too close to sitting and writing, and I need something else over this short break.