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I’m doing my usual nerves before a book comes out. In my mind, every time I do the pre-nerve thing, it’s new. I don’t do this every time, but according to my friends and family, yeah, I do.

I asked Jon yesterday, “Do I always get so I can’t work on anything just before a release date?”

“Yes,” he said.

Okay. Just before Charles went on his family vacation, I was freaking. I said, “You know how I’m feeling?”

His reply, “Normal, you always do this before a book comes out.”

Darla, my mother-in-law, my friends; everyone says the same. I always freak. Funny, but I seem to feel like every time I freak is the first time. That I’m like calm and controlled, but nope, apparently this freakazoid moment is “normal” for me at this point in time.

Blood Noir comes out Tuesday. Like in, tomorrow. Aaah! I can’t work on Merry. I can’t really work on anything. Thank God, we put the last bit of the comic of Guilty Pleasures to bed last week. I am so not going to finish Swallowing Darkness before tomorrow. I’m afraid my nerves are making me make bad decisions for the book, so I’ve put it aside for a few days. That blood bath at the end seems like a good idea, and I can’t tell if it’s the book talking, or my stage fright.

Is it stage fright? I don’t get nervous in front of crowds. I don’t get nervous when I talk on the phone or radio for interviews, anymore. Other than, thinking, don’t move too much, remember not to wear noisy jewelery. Try not to say anything that you don’t want repeated. Which, the longer you are on the road the harder it gets to not open mouth and insert foot. This is a short tour, and that is some comfort. I won’t be on the road long enough to get to the point where interviews become a challenge, not to say what you shouldn’t. I hope.

I have a lot of sympathy for the presidential hopefuls right now. They must have had thousands of interviews by now. You’d think you get better at it, and you do, smoother, but you also begin to get tired. You begin to answer on automatic, and sometimes automatic breaks down, then you say something that’s going to come back and bite you. Being on the road is one of the most exhausting things I’ve ever done, so all of the potential candidates must be so incredibly tired. It’s almost like we throw them in this media meat grinder and the person who comes out the best, wins. Does it really get us the best president? I don’t know, but it certainly shows who has stamina.

See, I already feel better. It could be so much worse. I could be running for president.